Greg Fitzsimmons

Quotes

I've got a three year-old and he wants to rollerblade and he said, "Daddy, I want to put on my helmet," and I said, "Suck it up, kid. We don't wear helmets in this family; we're men. No, not on the sidewalk - get in the street."

When you're 18, you meet somebody, and 15 seconds later, you're like, 'I love you... I love you! Is that your roommate? She's hot.'

I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.

When I was 18, I thought I was in love. First time - you know that magic feeling. So, I asked my father. I said, 'Dad is love real?' And he said, 'No. But herpes is, so watch your ass.'

I have to stop watching the Olympics. It just reminds me that I forgot to try really hard at something.

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