Jon Stewart

Quotes

What is the fear of the 'gay agenda' that has so upset people? Do people think that if gay people are given a place at the table, they'll be so convincing we'll all end up blowing them? What is the issue? 'You know, I'm straight, but you've made such a convincing argument...'

You wake up and you're still a little drunk and you can't believe that hot girl from last night actually has a beard and a penis.

I would think black people think everything is about race. They are the ones who are on the outside of the game. They are the ones who face it every day.

Originally we were going to title it The Daily Show With Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays Off, but it was too long.

I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it’s not even going to be consistent with the same person. People can hold liberal and conservative dogma points at the same time. They’re not living their lives via platforms. They’re living their lives. The whole thing is an awfully tired construct.

All quotes and jokes
Profile was viewed 122 times