Russell Peters

Quotes

No one is immune from being a target.

I knew she was Nigerian because everytime she looked at me and was like "I don't know what to order" Well look at the menu!

Just for the record my Arab friends, i dont do any Arab jokes in my act. Its not that i dont think you are funny. It's just .. I dont know, i dont wanna..... die?

Every group is racist. White folks will see a group of Indian people and they’re like, “Look at all those brown people, they’re probably all very happy together.” Then you get in that group and like, “Hey, you from India? I’m from India. What part? No, not that part. Go to hell you dirty bastard.”

Everyone in my school knew one thing. Nobody fucked with the deaf kids because deaf kids are strong as shit. They have the strength of 14 gorillas. One of my friends got into a fight with a deaf kid and the deaf kid beat 37 kinds of shit into my friend. He kept bashing him. I dont know if he couldnt hear the sound of the beating but he went berserk. I dont know if he was lip reading wrong. My friend was like "Stop. OW!" "*deaf kid accent* Stop telling me Fuck Off!"

All quotes and jokes
Profile was viewed 989 times