The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.
Quote by Rodney Dangerfield:
Quotes by other comedians
One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said, "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read."
It seems like movies that have heart to them always do well, and they find their audience.
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.
I don't like to drink alone 'cause there's nobody to fight with.
When I saw people dancing to it in jeans that had been dry-cleaned and cowboy boats and you're in New York City - that's when I said hand guns should be legal.