I asked my wife, 'Is there somebody else?' She said, 'There must be.'
Quote by Rodney Dangerfield:
Quotes by other comedians
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby's behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once.
A new poll shows only 3 percent strongly approve of the job Congress is doing, with a margin of error of 4 percent, so it’s possible that "less than no one" thinks they’re doing a good job.
Once you've had a man with no legs, you never go back baby.
He asked me if I knew what time it was. I said, "Yes, but not right now."