Quote by Woody Allen:

My analyst warned me, but you were so beautiful I got another analyst.

Comedian
Short bio
Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American director, writer, actor, and comedian whose career spans more than six decades. He began his career as a comedy writer in the 1950s, writing jokes and scripts for television and publishing several books of short humor pieces.

All quotes by Woody Allen

Quotes by other comedians

I don't know what possessed me, but yesterday I yelled out the wrong name in the middle of my girlfriend's funeral.

Comedy, such a lovely lady, she'll pick you up, you your feeling blue.

Ever since I've switched to the clean syringes, I've never felt better in my entire life.

When I was a kid and we used to play Post Office, I was the Dead Letter Office.

When my son said, "I can't stop thinking about girls," I said, "That's not gonna stop. Congratulations. You're in the club. From now until the day you die, one way or another you'll be thinking about girls."