Quote by Anthony Jeselnik:

I think it’s appropriate to start off with a rape joke. It’s good to find out what kind of audience I’m dealing with.

Short bio
Anthony Jeselnik is an American comedian, writer, actor, and producer. He is known for his dark comedy style, which emphasizes ironic misdirection, non sequiturs, biting insults, an arrogant demeanor, and a stage persona that frequently takes amoral stances.

All quotes by Anthony Jeselnik

Quotes by other comedians

Dave! Relax! Close your buttcheeks!

We don't do that here. We only take urine samples.

Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?