Quote by Bonnie McFarlane:

My sister would've liked to have been a comic. She had an act that she would do for me sometimes. But of course, she didn't become a standup comedian because she's kind of a big talker. Doesn't do a whole lot of the things she says she will. Like go to the moon. The truth is if she had done it, she would be so fucking famous right now. Her act was simply a stream of obscenities and giggling. Can you imagine? A retarded chick just standing on stage swearing and giggling?

Comedian
Short bio
Bonnie McFarlane is a Canadian-American comedian and writer. She is best known for appearing on the second season of the TV reality show Last Comic Standing and for co-hosting the podcast My Wife Hates Me with her husband, comedian Rich Vos.

All quotes by Bonnie McFarlane

Popular quotes by other comedians

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.

Twitter is one of those dangerous toys that if it gets in the hands of the wrong person you'll have the mind of a 12-year-old masquerading as an adult.

You know the little camel on the pack of cigarettes? They just found out that's not even a camel. It's actually a horse with a big, old tumor growing out of its mouth.

Black culture is a fight. We want to hold on to what we are, but sometimes the things that we are can be totally negative. You have to think: can't we try something new and not be seen as suspect?

As far as I’m concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that’s worth believing.