Quote by Bonnie McFarlane:


When one door closes another door opens. Usually a refrigerator.

Comedian
Short bio
Bonnie McFarlane is a Canadian-American comedian and writer. She is best known for appearing on the second season of the TV reality show Last Comic Standing and for co-hosting the podcast My Wife Hates Me with her husband, comedian Rich Vos.

All quotes by Bonnie McFarlane

Quotes by other comedians

It's not my dreams that get me in trouble, it's what my wife dreams I did. My wife punched me in the middle of the night; I woke up and went "Oww! What was that for?", and she goes "I dreamt you were making out with Faith Hill." I said "I wasn't dreaming anything! Send her over to my dreams, and we'll both be happy."

I was watching Discovery Channel the other day, and you know that they have come up with a new theory about how dinosaurs was wiped out? It was a midturn election...

I've decided to hire a 'food taster', not because I think anyone is trying to kill me, but because I want to make sure it's not to salty.