Quote by Chelsea Handler:


Angelina Jolie’s older brother James Haven, the one she made out with, has a license plate on his SUV that reads Shiloh. Maybe it’s not that weird. After all, he could be the father.

Comedian
Short bio
Chelsea Joy Handler is an American comedian, actress, writer, television host, producer, and activist. She hosted the late-night talk show Chelsea Lately on the E! network from 2007 to 2014, and released a documentary series, Chelsea Does, on Netflix in January 2016.

All quotes by Chelsea Handler

Quotes by other comedians

Contrary to public opinion, I'm not negative, just realistic.

But in the Olympics, in the last Olympics, we, Britain, didn't do very well, got no gold medals at all, which pissed me off. But we're setting up a British Olympics, where each and every event is a British event, like the British hundred metres: "Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, pardon me, excuse me… I think I was here first!" We should win that.

I began my show business career playing violin in San Francisco at the corner of Market and Taylor. I understand that there is a theater there now.