I am a man. And I am former baby and a future skeleton, and I am a distant future pile of dust.
Quote by Demetri Martin:
Quotes by other comedians
I'd distract myself until finally it was a combination of things. The show was over and I had time on my hands. I had taken time and played and just relaxed.
But I just think I was lucky enough to figure out early on that I wanted to do comedy, so that's what I put all my effort into.
We should have a way of telling people they have bad breath without hurting their feelings. "Well, I'm bored. Let's go brush our teeth." Or, "I've got to make a phone call. Hold this gum in your mouth."
If you can remember the sixties, you weren't there.
I just broke up with my girlfriend and the reason we broke up is I caught her lying. Under another man.