Dry land is not a myth. I've seen it. Kevin Costner. Waterworld. I don't know what the big fuss is about. I saw that movie nine times. It rules!
Quote by Jim Carrey:
Quotes by other comedians
Friends will write me letters. They run out of room on the front of the letter. They write 'over' on the bottom of the letter. Like I'm that much of a moron. Like I need that there. Because if it wasn't there, I'd get to the bottom of the page: 'And so Kathy and I went shopping and we' That's the craziest thing! I don't know why she would just end it that way.
My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
I'ma beat the puberty outta ya! You ain't gonna see it coming.
A woman was taking a shower. There is a knock on the door. "Who is it?" "Blind man!" The woman opens the door. "Where do you want these blinds, lady?"