I was at my parents' house all day - because I live there.
Quote by Gary Gulman:
Quotes by other comedians
Kids, do not fuck that shit; you'll get an infection.
I feel like the gods have certainly patted me on the head.
I have a wife back in LA who is so pissed at me... yeah, she’s so mad I’m sleeping with her husband.
I don't have a type, really. But I've always been more attracted to girls who yell "fire."
If it wasn't for the olives in his martinis, he'd starve to death!