Quote by Greg Behrendt:

I’m anal and forgetful. That’s a bad combo. That mean I like my shit where I like it and I don’t know where the fuck it is. But I’m pretty sure it’s your fault.

Comedian
Short bio
Gregory Behrendt is an American comedian and author. His work as a script consultant to the HBO sitcom Sex and the City paved the way for co-authoring of the New York Times bestseller He's Just Not That into You, later adapted into a film by the same name.

All quotes by Greg Behrendt

Quotes by other comedians

I have some bad news. Bjork cannot be here tonight. She was trying on her Oscar dress and Dick Cheney shot her.

Well, I think "likability" is an overused word. I don’t watch people 'cause I like them; I watch them because they’re compelling. Sympathetic is a little different. Likable just thins you out. Working to make a character likable is what kills most TV shows.

Writer’s block is a myth. I never see the gardeners suffering from gardening block.

I would believe in reincarnation but too many of me ex-girlfriends did and it isn't worth the risk.

Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.