I’m anal and forgetful. That’s a bad combo. That mean I like my shit where I like it and I don’t know where the fuck it is. But I’m pretty sure it’s your fault.
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Quotes by other comedians
I have some bad news. Bjork cannot be here tonight. She was trying on her Oscar dress and Dick Cheney shot her.
Well, I think "likability" is an overused word. I don’t watch people 'cause I like them; I watch them because they’re compelling. Sympathetic is a little different. Likable just thins you out. Working to make a character likable is what kills most TV shows.
Writer’s block is a myth. I never see the gardeners suffering from gardening block.
I would believe in reincarnation but too many of me ex-girlfriends did and it isn't worth the risk.
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.