My feeling is, the Pilgrims were asked to leave England. England was never funner than when the Pilgrims split, right? The people of England got a little tired of these dour, right-winged conservative psycho-Christians wearing all black, bumming people out, confusing everyone by wearing buckles on... their heads. "Is that tight enough for you, Cotton?" "Yea, verily.”
Quote by Greg Proops:
Quotes by other comedians
You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery.
Rooting for the Yankees is like going to a casino and rooting for the house.
I've seen too many comics who got their own shows and were undone because they worked for an executive producer who didn't understand their comedy or their sensibility.
The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.
Everyone has the same kind of fears; everyone has the same big problems in the world, which is, like, fear of death and 'I hope horrible things don't happen to my family,' but they do. And I think people laugh at them as this great release.