This isn’t a bra, it’s body armor. And this isn’t make up, it’s war paint.
Quote by Iliza Shlesinger:
Quotes by other comedians
My ex-girlfriend, who shall remain nameless – if I’m ever left alone at her tombstone with a sandblaster.
Yeah I've been booed before, but I'll be booed again.
Every generation has their challenge. And things change rapidly, and life gets better in an instant.
My first job as a kid was going from door to door selling Christmas cards, to raise money for my grandmother's hip replacement. Because, you know... You break it, you buy it.
At the Christmas party, the secretary with the long red hair ate three pickles, and four salesmen panicked.