Wasted is when you have a hankering for ice cream.
Quote by Adam Sandler:
Quotes by other comedians
Your husband is lazy if when he leaves the house, he finds out which way the wind is blowing and goes that direction.
Oh my god. Open and shut case, Johnson. I saw this once when I was a rookie. Apparently this nigger broke in and put up pictures of his family everywhere.
We would have never gotten mace had someone not thought, "There must be a good way to burn someone's eyes."