Quote by Adam Carolla:

Oprah tells women what to read, what to eat, what to think, what to do...

Comedian
Short bio
Adam Carolla is an American comedian, radio personality, television host, actor, podcaster, and director. He hosts The Adam Carolla Show, a talk show distributed as a podcast which set the record as the "most downloaded podcast" as judged by Guinness World Records in 2011.

All quotes by Adam Carolla

Quotes by other comedians

I spent all night feeding the homeless to dogs.

I use profanity because I like profanity, but I’m not vulgar. Big difference. I love profanity because I really think profanity is cool.

George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

I've had some bad shows where I just sucked, but I've had some assholes, too. Some guy stood up Saturday night and said 'This is the same shit you've been peddling the last five times you've been here.' That's your biggest fear: someone who knows every word you've ever said.