Eggnog, who thought that one up? “I wanna get a little drunk, but I also want some pancakes.” You know what eggnog really is. You’re not gonna want to hear it, but I’ll tell ya. It’s elf cum. You might as well pour it down your back and slap your self on the ass.
Quote by Dave Attell:
Quotes by other comedians
Nancy Reagan, who said to Jerry Zipkin, "What do you wear to a recession?" Never got a dinner!
I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
My life and my legs have been an open book.
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked."