Quote by Denis Leary:


Yeah, I'd like to do some cocaine. I'd like to do a drug that makes my penis small, makes my nose bleed, makes my heart explode, and sucks all my money out of the bank.

Comedian
Short bio
Denis Colin Leary is an American actor, comedian, singer, writer and producer. Leary was the star and co-creator of Rescue Me. He has had starring roles in many films, including those of Captain George Stacy in Marc Webb's, The Amazing Spider-Man and Cleveland Browns head coach Vince Penn in Ivan Reitman's Draft Day.

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Quotes by other comedians

I said I didn't respect religion... and anyone who believes in fairy tales to answer questions that we can't answer. So I don't respect our religions either. But I do believe it is a clash of civilizations, absolutely, between the Islamic world and the Western world. It has been going on for 1,000 years.

Women want you to suffer. You know what I mean? They want you to go 4 to 8 grand in debt. They want you to do that, and go to work every fucking day, knowing that you're working for their fucking love and the use of their fucking vagina.

Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.