I was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is cleared of all clatter and I'm looking out of my third eye and everything that I'm supposed to be doing. It's amazing what comes up, when you sit in that silence. 'Mama keeps whites bright like the sunlight, Mama's got the magic of Clorox 2.'
Quote by Ellen DeGeneres:
Quotes by other comedians
If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be a redneck.
The average comedian is kind of an observer looking at everyday things that everyone could relate to and then trying to find the exaggeration in those things.
Every eight minutes, someone has sex with an animal... and you wonder why the attack you. Because of that man, and its up to me and a half mexican to stop him!