I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.
Quote by Garry Shandling:
Quotes by other comedians
Magazines are another medium I love, because 95% is simply based on 'How the hell are we going to fill all this blank space?'
I was literally cheated on...I woke up and they were on top of me.
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.