Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
Quote by George Burns:
Quotes by other comedians
Nothing, believe me, nothing is more satisfying to me personally than getting a great idea and then beatin' it to death.
Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.
Everybody I’ve ever met was destroyed by a member of the opposite sex early on and that damage you took into every relationship after that, everybody. Every woman in here got intimidated by a guy, pushed around too much, now you’re new boyfriend tickles you a little too hard, boom restraining order. Every guy here had a woman sleep with his best friend, now your new girlfriend hugs your cousin a little long, boom car bomb.
I wrote a song, but I can't read music. Every time I hear a new song on the radio I think, 'Hey, maybe I wrote that.'
The competitions are as much a part of the tradition as the actual dances.