Quote by Martin Lawrence:

You used to be looking good from afar. Now you just far from looking good!


Quotes by other comedians

Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.

Think well of yourself and others will too. Unless those others are in government, banking, or show business.

My brain is very fantastical. If I ever actually recorded myself, I could probably win a Grammy for sex talk. Being on the road while in relationships, you need to learn to pleasure one another.

I know a husband whose neighbour boasted, “I got a cute little red sports car for my wife yesterday.” “Gosh,” sighed my friend, “I wish I could make a trade like that.”

And then we get here and five minutes after we arrive, the skies open up. It's completely nice and there was a rainbow above the thing we were shooting. So, I don't know, if God didn't want us to shoot, he sure fucked up today.