I don't live to eat, I eat to live.
Quote by Martin Lawrence:
Quotes by other comedians
I thought yoga was easy - I went out and I bought a yoga video tape. I bought the beginners' yoga tape. I couldn't do anything on the whole hour - nothing - just fast forwarding: can't do that, can't do that - I know I can't do that. This woman in a soothing voice: 'Simply take the bottom of your right foot and place it on the small of your back.'
I tell ya, gambling never agreed with me. Last week I went to the track and they shot my horse with the opening gun.
The only people who like to live alone more than comics are priests.
If it wasn't for Abe Lincoln, I'd still be on the open market.
It's hard for your mom to tell you she has an oral fixation and has to have something in her mouth. My step dad is in the kitchen winking at me. You down with OPP, yeah you know me. Exciting is and a special... What? Easy, and why do you know all the words? That's weird.