Quote by Paul Reiser:

Middle names are kind of like vice presidents: It's a fine distinction and certainly an honor, but you're never not aware that someone else got the real job.

Comedian
Short bio
Paul Reiser is an American comedian, actor, writer, and musician. He is known for his roles as Michael Taylor in the 1980s sitcom My Two Dads, Paul Buchman in the NBC sitcom Mad About You, Carter Burke in the 1986 film Aliens, and more recently as Jim Neiman in the 2014 film Whiplash and Doug Getty in the Amazon Video series Red Oaks'. Reiser is ranked 77th on Comedy Central's 2004 list of the "100 Greatest Stand-ups of All Time".

All quotes by Paul Reiser

Quotes by other comedians

Italian women are some of the most beautiful in the world. This is why the Vatican is in Italy. If a man can walk across Italy and retain his celibacy, he’s got what it takes to be a priest - or an interior decorator.

I used to have sex with my teachers in exchange for good grades on teacher evaluations.

Credibility lasts about two cycles of bad material, and then you'll probably never get it back. If you let people down, that's really hard to come back from - harder than climbing from nothing to something, even.

The real focus at first is to just become a good stand-up comedian, and then when you get to a certain level, then they allow you to do other things. You feel if you're overwhelmed by something or if you're not.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.