Uncle Remus, who said to Uncle Ben, "You're a credit to your rice." Never got a dinner!
Quote by Red Buttons:
Quotes by other comedians
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.
The success of any stand-up act comes out of life experience.
So when you do get on, the first class people are already sitting there; they're all sprawled out on their big thrones. "Bring me the head of a pig! And a goblet of something cool and refreshing! Anyone have a fiddle? Amuse me."