Quote by Robert Klein:

I have a feeling for obscure, historical characters like James Abram Garfield, who was the 20th President of the U. S. He was a pretty hones Congressman and Senator from Ohio. Elected eight times. Tremendous integrity. Only, the most famous thing he's remembered for is having been shot. And they always say the same thing for who shot him: “a disappointed office seeker.” And sure enough, you look at a child's milk-container collection of the Presidents, you'll see: “George Washington, Father of our Country; Thomas Jefferson, purchased Louisiana; Abraham Lincoln, Emancipation Proclamation; James Garfield, shot by a disappointed office seeker.” Look in an encyclopedia under Garfield, James Abram. It says, see Office Seeker, Disappointed. The office seeker got all the fame!

Comedian
Short bio
Robert Klein is an American stand-up comedian, singer, and actor. He had several comedy albums in the 1970s, was nominated for a Best Actor in a Musical Tony Award for 1979's They're Playing Our Song, and has made a variety of TV and movie appearances, including hosting Saturday Night Live twice.

All quotes by Robert Klein

Quotes by other comedians

My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me.

Critics noted Schwarzenegger's only previous government experience was serving as chairman of the Council of Physical Fitness, where his only responsibility was doing hundreds of jumping jacks he was doing anyway.

I've started looking at my own father a bit funny. He assures me, though, that I really am the son of a Scottish postman.

After all this time I found that the novel is in fact punk rock.

I’ll defend child pornography, how about that? What’s wrong with seeing some child pornography? What if you watch child pornography because you find it hilarious? Then should it not a protected freedom of speech?