Aries Spears

Quotes

I know when the anthrax thing hit, white people y’all was very nervous. Y’all would come up to me at work and warn me, “Oh my God Aries, be careful. Don’t open the mail.” Black folks was never worried about anthrax. Because half the time we don’t open our mail no way. We might think that’s a bill… Y’all want to get us with anthrax, put that in a Jay-Z CD.

You knew at some point that he was supposed to win. He had all the right ingredients that came together at the right time. He's tall, good looking, articulate, highly intelligent, smooth under pressure, charismatic and, most importantly, he was the right shade. He made white people feel comfortable. 'Cause you all know if that nigger was Bernie Mac black or 'Precious' purple, he wouldn't have won. He's like coffee with cream; it goes down easy. You ever have coffee black? It's too strong.

That's where the money is, on the road.

The average comedian is kind of an observer looking at everyday things that everyone could relate to and then trying to find the exaggeration in those things.

I never wanted to limit myself to just impressions. I wanted to branch out and develop other parts of my game.

All quotes and jokes
Profile was viewed 2047 times