The weatherman is always right. It's just his timing that's off.
Only people as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity.
I graduated from Temple University. Physical education major with a child psychology minor. Which means if you ask me a question about a child’s behavior, I will tell you to tell the child to take a lap.
A person with no children says, "Well I just love children," and you say "Why?" and they say, "Because a child is so truthful, that's what I love about 'em - they tell the truth." That's a lie, I've got five of 'em. The only time they tell the truth is if they're having pain.
The three ingredients of a successful union between two ... humor, commitment & undying love.All quotes and jokes