I masturbate ‘cause I’m the only one whose standards are low enough to FUCK ME.
Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.
It’s a show that I hope feels intimate in theme, but bigger in presentation. I love Tim Minchin, Bill Bailey and Hans Teeuwen and I’m trying to synthesise elements of theatre into my show a little bit more. I want it to be surprising and rich and fun to watch, and maybe a little confusing. It’ll be very loud and very quiet and very sad and very happy, with things that have you leaving the theatre going, "what..." And not "what" with a question mark; just "what", period.
I think that God might think I’m gay... what does he know anyway?
I stopped and I thought, ‘What would Jesus do?” So I didn’t exist.All quotes and jokes