I've been trying to quit smoking weed and it's really hard quitting pot. It was actually easier to become a vegetarian because your friends never show up at your house with a sack of beef.
Is it weird that when your wife’s giving you oral sex, that you go "We're going to make a mouth baby!"
I do think certain kinds of music can make you violent. Like, when I listen to Nickelback, it makes me want to kill Nickelback.