Chic Murray

Quotes

There’s a new slimming course just out where they remove all your bones. Not only do you weigh less, but you also look so much more relaxed.

My mother was so house proud that when my father got up to sleepwalk she had the bed made by the time he got back.

We’ve got stained glass windows in our house; it’s those damned pigeons.

It was a pretty posh place. They were so used to fur coats that two bears strolled in and ordered lunch and nobody even noticed.

My girlfriend’s a redhead; No hair, just a red head.

All quotes and jokes