Dov Davidoff

Quotes

You know you’re too high when you’re eating cereal naked and your girlfriend is like “Put some clothes on” and you realize that it’s not your girlfriend. It’s just a woman on the bus.

If procrastination were a marketable skill, I'd be a real hot commodity.

Writing good jokes requires effort. Think I'll just start dressing funnier.

Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.

People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.

All quotes and jokes