People don't know how to behave in public anymore.

I have so much to say when I'm driving and I only have a horn. A horn don't say enough. A horn just goes, "screeeeeeeew yooooooou!" Right? I want a microphone. A microphone with a speaker on top, like the cops got. You can have 'em, too. Freedom of speech includes volume.

Why do they call that funny little statue a bust when it stops right before the part of the body that it's named after?

I don't want to overthrow the government. I wanna fire 'em.

What can you say in America? Can I say Priscilla Presley has a big butt? Will I have to prove it in a court of law? Hey, Priscilla, you wanna back it on in here, huh? If she can fit in the witness chair we'll drop, Your Honor.

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