George Carlin

Quotes

“Meow” means “woof” in cat.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

“No comment” is a comment.

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.

You can say prick on television. If it happens to your finger it’s alright. You can prick your finger, just don’t finger your prick.

All quotes and jokes