Groucho Marx

Quotes

It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

All quotes and jokes