Groucho Marx

Quotes

It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.

All quotes and jokes