You have to have a lot more dedication to what I'll call 'the machine,' ... I have 20 percent dedication. What's needed is 110 percent. You can't have it with the level of apathy I have.
Also, as I've gotten older and more mature, I've become much more comfortable in my own skin. After 25 years of doing stand-up, that's reflected onstage.
You know, I've had Botox. The woman who does it is very good, obviously. Very conservative.
I can't wait for the next fad though, and I predict it's going to be Pennsylvania dutch culture, very Amish. It's going to be bonnets and butter churns.
You young people with your twittering and your creating of content. Or what is it - queefing? I don't know what you young people are calling it.All quotes and jokes