Johnny Carson

Quotes

Ed and I were out last night and I asked him why he drank so much. He said he drank to forget. I asked him, "To forget what?" And he said he couldn't remember.

I wanted the show to make the most of being the last area of television that the medium originally was supposed to be - live, immediate entertainment. I decided the best thing I could do was forget trying to do a lot of pre-planning. It all boiled down to just going out there and being my natural self and seeing what would happen.

I would like to say, for the record, that I am in favor of using more American Indians and other minorities in motion pictures, I am against polluting the oceans of the world, I am for every nationality having its own homeland, I am against whacking baby seals on the head, and I am for saving the whales.

I hated my last boss. He asked, “Why are you two hours late?” I said, “I fell downstairs.” He said, “That doesn’t take two hours.”

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

All quotes and jokes
Profile was viewed 96 times