Milton Berle


She was nice to him on Valentine’s Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.

Every year my boss used to give me a bottle of expensive brandy because I’d told him that my doctor suggested a drink once in a while. This year my boss gave me the name of a new doctor.

My son gave me a nice bottle of cologne - Eau de Owe.

All my wife wanted for Valentine’s Day was a little card – American Express.

I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.

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