Sarah Silverman

Quotes

What the fuck am I doing?

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

I'm Jewish, but I'm totally not.

You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people all the time.

"[To a member of the audience] You look like my friend Debbie. That's really weird … do you get that a lot? [Pause] It's sad, though, 'cause you know, we're not really friends anymore. But, uh, it's not your fault. Seriously, it was 'cause she's, um … not born again Christian … oh! pathological liar."

All quotes and jokes