Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Quote by Steven Wright:
Popular quotes by other comedians
I developed several comedy phone calls.
A New York City judge struck down a proposed law to ban sodas larger than 16 ounces. I think Mayor Bloomberg should spend his time trying to improve stuff like education. New York needs a better education system if kids didn’t figure out they could get around the 16-ounce soda ban by simply purchasing two 12-ounce sodas.
I am fortunate to have had the opportunity to usher the program through its early stages of growth. For 10 years I have approached my responsibilities with pride and with passion. It has been a tremendous experience to work with our amazing student-athletes.
I love to eat. That's why I got so fat; I love to eat. If I don't walk away from a meal hurting, I didn't do it right. If I don't walk away from Thanksgiving dinner feeling like I've been turkey-fucked in a gingerbread prison, I didn't do it right.
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.