Oh, what’s this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I’m walking on red carpet.
Quote by Aziz Ansari:
Quotes by other comedians
My girlfriend was just killed in a car accident. Devastating. I can't believe I'm only going to have sex with her one more time.
You might be a redneck if you list your parole officer as a reference.
The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.