Quote by Christopher Titus:


If I am ever brain dead, kill Titus. If I cannot control the fluids spewing out of my own orifices, please kill Titus. If I'm not aware enough to pick which diapers I would like to be changed into, for God's sake, kill Titus - unless I'm really funny.

Comedian
Short bio
Christopher Todd Titus is an American comedian and actor. He grew up in Newark, California. Titus came to network audiences with the eponymous FOX show Titus, of which he was the star, executive producer and co-creator.

All quotes by Christopher Titus

Quotes by other comedians

It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do a special in Africa. Can't beat that. Pull that off, then I will have done something.

Are you allowed to smoke eCigarettes without arrogance?

I xeroxed my watch. Now I can give away free watches.