When you jerk off, you’re saying “Hey, I care about me.”
Quote by Andrew Dice Clay:
Quotes by other comedians
You can start any Monty Python routine and people finish it for you. Everyone knows it like shorthand.
I once met a beautiful, proper English girl. I bid her adieu.... she bid me a don't.
If you have more fish on your wall than pictures, you might be a redneck.