In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
Quote by Billy Crystal:
Quotes by other comedians
Ted Kennedy, a good senator but a bad date you know what I mean? "What'd I forget? Goddamit the fuckin' girl! Jesus Christ where are my pants?"
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no fucking sense make.
You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
My body's in such bad shape I wear prescription underwear.