Quote by Dave Attell:

There's a fine line between masturbating while you look out a window, and masturbating while you’re looking in a window. I'll give you a hint: one of 'em is super illegal.

Comedian
Short bio
David Attell is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and writer. He is best known as the host of Comedy Central's Insomniac with Dave Attell, which earned him a cult following. Fellow comics Patton Oswalt and Bill Burr have hailed him as the greatest off-color comedian alive.

All quotes by Dave Attell

Quotes by other comedians

I came home, the car was in the dining room. "How did you get the car in here?" "Easy, I took a left at the kitchen."

Somebody help me, I'm being spontaneous!

There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.

I want to make a revolving door that says 'Pull' on it, just see how obedient people are.

I'm getting drunk, watching Sabrina and wondering if 9:30 is too early to go to bed.