Quote by Jack Benny:

I was going to buy my girl a Packard car for Christmas, but it took too long to deliver, so I bought her some handkerchiefs.

Comedian
Short bio
Jack Benny, often called "Jackson" on his own show, was an American comedian, vaudevillian, radio, television and film actor, and violinist.

All quotes by Jack Benny

Popular quotes by other comedians

I really don't know what makes a comedian. I think it's a family background and environment. Yet if you put the same ingredients in another person, he may never utter a funny line.

Well I have a drug history and a public drinking problem and I am not the healthiest guy. So they just ran that I died of a drug overdose.

You know that show 'Teen Mom'? Or if you're from the South, 'Mom.'

I don't think people shouldn't try to be edgy, but you have to take what the audience says to you in consideration.

I'm a rap comedian the same way Bill Cosby is a jazz comedian, Cosby's laid back. I'm like, bang, bang bang, right into it.