Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
Quote by Jackie Mason:
Quotes by other comedians
I feel so badly about what they do to turkeys. That's why this year my family and I are eating a live bird.
The problem with dating a model is they won’t go out with you if your cars color doesn’t match their outfit.
In America, if we're speaking truth, women are called bitches. I seek next Mother's Day a march of one million American bitches who can get the job done, the job of getting the food to the hungry and thereby saving our rich American friends and neighbors from going straight to hell and burning there for all of eternity.