Getting married for sex is like buying a 747 for the free peanuts.
Quote by Jeff Foxworthy:
Quotes by other comedians
You know why the French hate us so much? Thay gave us the croissant. And you know what we did with it? We turned it into our croissandwich, thank you very much.
I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum.
You might be a redneck if there are more dishes in your sink than in your cabinets.
I thought when we elected a black president, we were going to get a black president. You know, BP oil spill is where I want a real black president. I want him in a meeting with the BP CEOs, you know, where he lifts up his shirt so you can see the gun in his pants. That’s - "we’ve got a motherfucking problem here?" Shoot somebody in the foot.
God forbid I should have a simultaneous orgasm with anybody. My goal this year is to make love being naked.